Year-End Recap

With the end of the year in sight, I wanted to review my goals from the beginning of the year. It seems almost an exercise in futility as I KNOW I have failed in several places, but it's still important to see where I did & didn't measure up to my own expectations. So here they are again, my personal goals for 2010:

God & Family
* incorporating structured Bible studies into Wednesday's lesson plans. This was almost TOO easy to change. I am happy to say that we now have a weekly Bible study, as well as lessons on Christian role-models as they appear in history.

Around the House
* the daily chore-schedule... this one seems to have been hit-or-miss. We DO keep it up, but only 4 days per week. Perhaps a re-vamp of the system is in order?
* And the 15-minute morning cleanups? Not bad. We are finding the time to do this only twice per week rather than the five times I had planned, but this in combination with our evening chores is keeping the house nicely manageable.

and Just for ME
* losing 30 pounds... yeah. Oh, how I wish I could forget I ever promised this! Unfortunately I was not ALLOWED to exercise until August due to the dratted shingles. However from then 'til December I truly have no excuse other than laziness. I am now 20 pounds heavier than I was at this time last year, and absolutely hating it. However I AM almost a week into a new exercise regime, and have recruited my husband as accountability-police. So there is a light at the end of this long, dark, scary tunnel.
* And my weekly crafting? Yep, that was forgotten in the middle of hourly dilation drops & steroid-induced migraines. I HAVE been crafting more since fall however, and plan on continuing as I have these past three months. There are already quite a few new crafts lined up on my to-do list, and I have a happy little recruit who is looking forward to helping me which should ensure that this actually happens.

Well there it is. I've not completely failed, but I definitely need to stay motivated this coming year. This will be my contemplation for the rest of the week - determining how best to tweak, change & add to this knowledge for NEXT years goals!

the marks of motherhood

From the time I was three, I knew what I wanted to be when I grew up. I wanted to be a mom and work with kids. I told people I was going to be the greatest mom that ever lived.

My first real "experience" with motherhood began while pregnant with my son. I had HUGE purple trails running from bellybutton-to-thigh, that were several inches wide and ITCHED. When I asked the doctor what they were he told me quite frankly, "Oh, those? They're the worst case of stretchmarks I've seen in 28 years!"

Welcome to motherhood... you're now marked for life.

And yes, they grew even LARGER with my second pregnancy. My son used them as racetracks for his Matchbox cars as he "played with the baby" in-utero, and my daughter's knuckles were clearly visible through my paper-thin skin. I was told that they would fade, promised that they would disappear, and people swore that they would stop itching. They were all wrong - they're still with me, still purple, and even after 15 years - they still itch!

Over the years I have been shocked & embarrassed by, resolved to endure, accepting of, and finally proud of these marks. They are a visible symbol of my efforts at becoming that "greatest mom that ever lived." Each one of these purple trails is here to show me that to become the greatest mom, there are things I will need to endure, and that things will happen beyond my control that I just need to accept. They are the merit-badges I have earned on my journey through motherhood.

Eleanor Roosevelt once said that "true friends will leave footprints in your heart." My kids chose to leave roadmaps on my belly - and as I look at them I no longer see scars or deformities... but a sunrise of hope & success rising above flames of frustration & failure. The marks that once terrified me have become my inspiration to try harder each day.

Every mom has a story, and every mom carries her own marks - I just wear a few of mine on the outside. I only pray that others can learn to accept their own marks sooner than it took me to accept my own.

New Year, New Goals

Nothing like starting the year by procrastinating, right? Here I am, a full week into the new year & only now getting around to compiling my annual goals. This is actually fairly important to me - because what I write down, I tend to accomplish. What I only tell myself I will do, doesn't always happen. For me, this is a time to sit down & go over the last year, and ponder what "worked" and what "needs changing" and plan to change one or two things in order to improve my life. I like to break things down by category, and change a little from several areas of my life rather than simply focusing on one aspect of me. So for THIS year, these are the things I would like to change. God & Family * I will be incorporating structured Bible studies into our Wednesday lesson plans. We already do Bible memorization, but it's time to STUDY now too!  Around the House * We have had a daily chore-schedule for years... starting this year, we will be USING it to keep our house company-ready & de-cluttered at all times. * And this leads to my second goal... I have been making the kids work in their rooms for 15 minutes each morning, but have NOT done so myself. This year they are holding Mama accountable... when they do their 15 minutes, Mama works in HER room too! and Just for ME * I will be working on losing another 30 pounds this year... more would be nice, but when I lose weight slower, I tend to keep it off. * And finally... this year I am putting my crafting on the calendar as well. The kids are old enough that I can "steal" two hours each week, so starting now every:

1st Saturday is sewing day 2nd Saturday is paper scrapbooking day 3rd Saturday is "miscellaneous crafting" day and 4th Saturday is digital scrapbooking day.

None of these are lofty goals... at the moment I am much more interested in being able to accomplish each of my goals than in creating imposing lists that sap my time & motivation. So now it's time to get everything written on the calendar, and begin the changes!